Biden Has Hilarious Plan to Get Back on Track

President Joe Biden offered a laughable solution to his ongoing age-related gaffes to Democratic governors at a meeting to address their concerns.

After increasing calls from sitting members of Congress for Biden to be replaced on the ticket, he called a meeting to ease the minds of anxious governors and seek their public support.

According to two people who are familiar with the meeting, Biden told the group he would limit evening events after 8pm so he can get more sleep.

An Axios report previously cited Biden’s aides as saying the president is only reliably engaged between the hours of 10am to 4pm. He reportedly becomes fatigued easily and often naps in the afternoon.

An unnamed lawmaker responded with disbelief to Biden’s plan for more sleep.

“I don’t think it helps anything. It doesn’t help,” that person said. “What if we have a crisis in the middle of the night?”

California Governor Gavin Newsom attempted to downplay the remarks, saying they were not meant to be taken literally.

“It was more of a rhetorical framework of just being fit and rested because he was burning at both ends, you know, that last 10 or so days. And I think that was sort of what he was reflecting, is just a more steady focus on being his energetic self,” Newsom said.

During the meeting, he also apparently joked that his health is fine, “it’s just my brain”, another source told NBC News.

“He was clearly making a joke and then said, ‘All kidding aside,’” Biden campaign chair Jen O’Malley Dillon said Thursday in response to questions about the meeting.

Doubts Linger

Biden’s next chance to show his plan in action will be Friday evening, when a pre-taped interview with ABC News airs. But some doubt it will be enough to matter.

“One interview is not going to fix this,” Representative Debbie Dingell (D-MI) said. “He’s got one thing to do, which is to get up and go out to prove to people that he can do the job, will do the job and has the stamina.”

Representative Scott Peters (D-CA) felt similarly.

“The campaign has been very, I think, arrogant in its response,” he said. “If they don’t have a plan, then I think we have to move in a different direction.”

Some wealthy donors have also expressed concern.

Abigail Disney, heiress to the Walt Disney Company, said she would withhold further donations to the party until Biden dropped out.

“I intend to stop any contributions to the party unless and until they replace Biden at the top of the ticket. This is realism, not disrespect. Biden is a good man and has served his country admirably, but the stakes are far too high,” she said.